A sweet young thing (SYT) I know always forgets her toothbrush when she visits. We have also discussed some of the basics of travel, and the young lady seems dubious. I intend to send her Grapeshots Basic Rules for When Ladies Travel. In case you don't know them, here they are.
1) Basic Brushes. Pack your toothbrush and your hairbrush. You will need both.
2) Always bring a sweater or sweat shirt, no matter how hot the forecast.
3) Whenever you have the chance to use a clean ladies room, go. Whether you have to or not.
4) If food is offered while you are travelling, take it. Eat now or later, but at least you can eat.
One can develop a bearish hunger sitting on the runway waiting 5 1/2 hours for take off.
5) Never take more than you can easily carry.
I won't prevail upon the SYT, who is too young for coffee and spirits, but for you, and you know who are are: Ignore all twaddle about jet lag diets and abstaining from booze and caffein. We live in a truly wimp society. If you don't believe me, consider the soy latte decaf.
And why do people lug around suitcases that you could stuff a hippopatmus into? I mean big.
What is in them? I always watch at luggage carousels in hopes that one of those immense mothers will pop upon and All Will Be Revealed.
1) complete set of king size bedding with assorted throw pillows
2) works of Anthony Trollope
3) around the world wardrobe for the Arctic and the Tropics with Nanook of the North seal coat and pith helmets for safari
4) industrial size cans of hair spray and deoderant. A 100 oz. bottle of Tide to keep everything clean. Three hair dryers and extra large hot rollers.
5) a breadbox
6) mother-in-law
Travel light! Bon Voyage!
Grapeshot
Thursday, July 13, 2006
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